Photography operates through the transmission of agreed-upon codes that convey their underlying ideology. “Agreed-upon” here does not necessarily mean what a surface read might lead to. We do not enter the world in a fashion that at some stage involves us facing some bureaucrat who will present us with a list of codes that we have to agree to. There are no bureaucrats, or rather in some fashion we all act as that bureaucrat (whether we want to or not — it takes conscious effort to depart from that role).
The agreement is tacit, and it’s produced in such a fashion that voicing one’s disapproval is widely seen as a violation of what is presented as the natural order of things. We see this mechanism in place everywhere, especially now. Feminists, for example, are routinely attacked by public figures and the media for their attempts to create a more just society — often in societies that at least on paper are committed to providing exactly that: a just society.
We acquire photography’s codes and by extension the ideology sustained by them through exposure. And since we only see what exists in photographs but not what might exist in photographs, it’s difficult to understand how the codes are in fact not part of the truly natural order of things. And yet, they feel natural, especially, of course, if, like me, you’re one of the people towards whom these codes are geared: I am a man, living in a society that’s largely structured around the needs of men.
Curiously, there now is a crisis of masculinity. These days, that’s one of the talking points that gets bandied about a lot. I would agree, albeit absolutely not following the logic of the claim as it is usually made. The crisis of masculinity is not that men cannot be men any longer, which usually means being, you know, in charge, regardless of the consequences.
Instead, the crisis of masculinity is that the men in crisis are unable to understand and deal with the fact that masculinity itself is a lot more complex than the reductive version they believe in. In addition, if women and people outside of the binary system of human sexuality insist on having the same rights as men, then that does not mean that men’s rights somehow are being diminished.
After all, life in a society does not follow the logic of a zero-sum game. Someone else gaining more rights does not mean that someone else’s rights somehow are being diminished. In reality, a society moving towards more justness can only result in an enrichment of everyone’s well being (it’s telling, though, that some of the people who will tell us that a rising tide will lift all boats when it comes to money don’t believe in that when it comes to human rights).

In the world of photography, the codes with which gender relations are communicated are typically summarized under the term the male gaze. “Men act and women appear,” the late John Berger explained in Ways of Seeing, “men look at women. Women watch themselves being looked at. This determines not only most relations between men and women but also the relation of women to themselves. The surveyor of woman in herself is male: the surveyed female. Thus she turns herself into an object — and most particularly an object of vision: a sight.”
It’s easy to understand how this is a problem. The male gaze establishes a hierarchy in society, and a society cannot be truly free if it contains hierarchies of any kind. The camera, in other words, becomes a tool of injustice if its use is not being questioned by those behind it and if the photographs made with it are not understood for what they are.
One might wonder what the (or maybe rather a — it’s possible to imagine a multitude) female gaze might look like, or maybe a gaze that exists outside of the male one. Outside but not necessarily opposed to, because thinking about this in terms of a competition brings us right back into zero-sum-game territory. An alternative gaze might help us see the world in a different fashion, a fashion that can increase the need we might feel towards helping build a more just society.
The problem with codes is that almost inevitably they’re reductive. The male gaze is relatively simple, and it’s reductive. The idea can’t really be to replace one reductive system with another. Instead, if you think about photography, the idea might be to instead arrive at photographs that are fully open, photographs that see people for who they are — and not as pawns in some larger prearranged game that only benefits some but not all.
What this might look like has now been demonstrated by Ahndraya Parlato in her new book Time to Kill. The book presents a series of portraits of women as women. By that I don’t mean women as they have to operate following the codes established by the male gaze; I mean women that have not been subjected to the male gaze, that operate outside of the confines of the male gaze.
(There are additional photographs in the book, mostly studio still lifes, and there is some text in the form of short letters written by the photographer to an unnamed person who would appear to be operating outside of the limits of mortality. For me, the emotional core of the book are the photographs of the women, which is why I will be focusing on them here.)

One of my concerns about the way the female gaze is being treated in the world of photography is that it is centered on its makers. It’s true, we have to think about photographers. We certainly have to think about who makes the photographs and how.
But photographs that are being released into the world are not complete. By that I mean that a photograph reveals itself only when it is viewed by another person. That person will also have to do some form of labour to understand what they are seeing, and how they are seeing what they’re seeing.
In other words, we will not arrive at a female gaze (or any other gaze outside of the male one) if we do not include viewers in our consideration. Of course, as makers of photographs it is impossible to perform that consideration. You can put any kind of verbiage around your photographs and/or books, but that’s not going to do the job. As a photographer, you essentially release visual messages in a bottle, not knowing who will encounter them — and how.
Thus, the viewer will have to do their own work. That work will (I’m tempted to write: must) entail looking at photographs without judgement. After all, male-gaze codes are geared towards a specific form of judgment, the judgment that hovers around John Berger’s words.
The bodies on view — women’s — are judged in any number of ways around very specific ideas of attractiveness (that are culturally coded). And there are so many rules that actively diminish attractiveness, all of them playing a person’s biology against them.
As long as the male gaze is so dominant, the key is thus to try to look without judging, to look without coming to any sort of initial conclusion. As a viewer, you will want to see the person in the photographs for who they are in that photograph (remember, a photograph will never show you the person, only a mediated image).

This is how you want to look at Time to Kill. This is how you can begin to de-program the male gaze from your mind.
I’m a little bit hesitant to give Buddhist practice as an example, given that neoliberal capitalism has co-opted mindfulness as a life-style tool. But the actual Buddhist idea of approaching the world in a non-judgmental way provides a great way to re-learn looking at photographs.
Look at a photograph, and every time a thought pops up in your head, catch it and interrogate it: what is it that makes me think that? What form of judgement am I arriving at? Tell yourself: no judgement. Just look.
You will not be able to shed all judgment. Instead, you will become more aware of your thinking and of how you look at photographs. In other words, you will become more aware of what determines what you see in a photograph.
In the end, photography is a social practice that connects a photographer with possibly a multitude of other people. For that social practice to get better, the work has to be done at both ends.
There is a shared responsibility to look at photographs with the same attention and care that went into their making.
Time to Kill is an absolutely marvelous book that will only reveal itself fully if as a viewer you are willing and able to match Ahndraya Partato’s attention and care.
Recommended.
Time to Kill; photographs and text by Ahndraya Parlato; 144 pages; MACK; 2026
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